That’s what I’ve really become, these days. Lol! I’m joking, Chetz.
But just for you, and because you can’t remember… Here’s your speech which makes me bawl everytime I read it still!
My sister’s special speech on the night of our wedding in March 2006:
“When I was asked to say a few words tonight, I really didn’t want to at all. That’s coz I know I’ll start blubbing if I make a speech, and we all know that runny mascara is so not a good look.But I suppose it makes sense that I say a few words about the bride because I was there from Day One. Literally. I was sitting in her crib, waiting for her to come home from the hospital. You see, when my parents told me about Janice, I was like: ‘Yes! Gor is not going to get a baby brother. I’m going to get the baby sister that I want!’ This was my one chance to make sure I raised – along with my mom – that I raised the perfect baby princess child. That is, a girl just like me, right? I was going to make sure she did what I did, wore what I wore, bought the same toys I bought, etc.
Janice, however, had other ideas. Right from Day One, she was going to be her own person.
For example, one day I was playing with her in her crib, and my mother was pottering around in the kitchen doing whatever it is that mothers do, when she suddenly heard a crash followed by a loud wailing. She rushed into the room and found me sitting among a pile of wooden rubble, screaming my lungs out. Where was Janice? She was just hanging on the side of the crib, nonchalantly coping with the situation and watching the world go by.
It wasn’t just how she dealt with situations either that we were different. She tended to have her own ideas when it came to taste. She couldn’t choose her own outfits in the early years of course, since she tended to wear my hand-me-downs. But she sure made some strange choices when it came to toys!
Take the case of the Strawberry Shortcake dolls. Strawberry Shortcake is this line of Mattel dolls that are scented. Strawberry Shortcake smells of strawberry, Raspberry Tart smelled of raspberry, and so on. When my parents first said we could get a couple of the dolls, I was very upset that the store had run out of Strawberry Shortcake herself. Oh well, no matter, I got her best friend, Raspberry Tart. What did Janice get? She chose Orange Blossom – a little black doll with a big afro. Why? Because it reminded her of her best friend in kindergarten – a little Indian girl called Kavita.
Then later, when I finally found Strawberry Shortcake, she decided to get Purple Pieman, Strawberry’s nemesis. Why? Because no one will buy him and he’d be all lonely. Still later, she got Sour Grapes, the villian-ness, to keep Purple Pieman company.
And it wasn’t just the Strawberry Shortcake dolls. There were the Cabbage Patch Kids too. The Cabbage Patch Kids were infant-sized dolls with birth certificates which you ‘adopted’. Well, one Christmas, when my parents allowed us to ‘adopt’ a couple of Cabbage Patchies, I went ballistic in the Cabbage Patch aisle of Toys’R’Us. After careful consideration, I chose the cutest little girl with the cutest little frock and the cutest, fluffiest red braids. Which one did Janice choose? She wanted a bald baby. Coz otherwise if no one adopted it, it would never grow up and have fluffy red braids like mine.
Although she often followed what I did, Janice almost always walked her own path. We both did ballet, but she eventually went into musicals and choreography. And though she also became a journalist, she chose features writing rather than hard news. Then when she met Andrew, she started developing some seriously weird hobbies. To my utmost horror, she started running, mountain biking and now she’s a triathlete of no small achievement.
So she never really ever became the perfect little princess that I intended for her to be. But am I disappointed? Absolutely not! She’s grown into a sister who not only comes to me with her growing pains and problems, she’s grown into a sister to whom I go to with my growing pains and problems. Yes, Janice is a girl’s best friend – something many of you here today attest to. I look around the room now and see her best friends from primary school, secondary school, boarding school and university. Many of her colleagues from her various jobs are here too.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that if anyone here deserves happiness, it’s you, Janice, because you have spread so much happiness around. And Andrew, you are indeed blessed to be the source of her happiness.
And so before I start blubbing and ruin my make-up, I shall love you and leave you with this parting shot: Janice, since you have beat me to the wedding altar, do feel free to beat me to the maternity ward… and have lots of little children just as unique and special as you. Muah.”
‘You should have seen your face, man. Super duper violent quivering lip.’ – Chetz